AAHH!

AAAAHH! Presentation on 40 page article at 10 am tomorrow of which I've maybe read 10 pages and what I have read I don't understand. Why don't I understand? Because it is an extremely complicated discussion of other historians' writings, many of which I was already supposed to read for this class but have not. So, I feel incapable of talking about this article without trying to read all those articles that I did not read, which of course will not happen, because it's after midnight.

If I had started earlier I would feel better, and this article would be doable, but I was persuaded to go to another good bye dinner and it took up the whole night. So now I don't have the time to do a good job. DAMN it Carolyn.

My brain is starting to get tired. Damn DAmn Damn.

Fuck my teacher for giving me this article. It is really a joke. It is soooooo.....

I don't even know how to say.
The only real point I have gotten out of it so far is that the "STATE" is something constructed. AS in it's not real. HOWEVER, huhuhuh, because we believe it is real, it has some realness to it.
Sorry for the word realness, don't know what else to say.
AND, this is his other big point, even though the state is not real, one can study the history of how the state was constructed! SO, though this thing does not actually exist, it does have a history.

Good, four sentences, and yet somehow, he spends forty pages discussing the Ottoman empire in the 1600s.... No, discussing other people discussing the Ottoman Empire in the 1600s.
Damn, I am smarter than this.